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Body Language To Attract Women And Maintain Relationships

DATING TO RELATING FOR MEN – WEEKLY COLUMN– 3/30/09

Dating To Relating For Men- Advice By Mr. L. Rx

Released by AssociatedNews.US

Mr. L. Rx is the author of the popular DatingToRelating.com website and the author of the popular book “Dating To Relating – From A To Z”. Have a question? Send it to Column@DatingToRelating.com and it may be selected for answer in this column. (Sorry all questions cannot be answered.)

Question: How does the body language you use to attract a woman differ from the body language you use to maintain a relationship

Answer: How do the two differ? Well, for example, if you read the advice in most body language books you will see a lot of advice on using posture, stance, eyes, etc. to portray confidence. Women in general are attracted to confidence in a man. However, our guiding principle with someone that you have already established a relationship with is “keep doing whatever you did to attract the woman in the first place”.

Though it may be true that most women are attracted to men who portray confidence, perhaps your woman is not like the average woman and likes shy guys. Perhaps she was attracted to you because you didn’t portray confidence around women. Well, if that is the case, then flirting with your girlfriend or wife may involve going back to those non-verbal clues that you used to give off about your shyness and lack of confidence. Perhaps since you got your girl, you are no longer shy and lack confidence with her and perhaps that is now a “turn off” or “failure to turn on” for her.

You have to go back to what worked in the beginning as a lower gradient each and every time you want to flirt with her or seduce her. Perhaps she likes it when you are shy and she originates sex with you. Perhaps you then can become aggressive and un-shy when you get to the higher stages of sexual interest.

This is just an example. But the idea is to go back to your exact overall pattern of how you attracted her in the first place and the body language that worked for you in the first place. Obviously it worked.

Now that doesn’t mean you don’t simultaneously listen to your mate. If she complains that you do not stand up straight, or that you don’t walk along side of her or don’t hold her hand, she is giving you big clues as to the kind of body language she wants to see from you.

If you are smart you will pay attention to her clues and adjust yourself accordingly. It will undoubtedly please her and turn her on.

Question: Mr. L. Rx, Can you actually meet women with personal ads?

Answer: Well, yes you most certainly can. In fact I wrote a book entitled “How I Got 700 Dates In One Year” and personal ads was one of the two methods I used and still use to generate hundreds of dates a year. Craigslist and Backpage are two of the best personal ad forums on the Internet and there are many newspaper that run personal ads too.

In general, I find newspaper personal ads to work best but it does require a little bit of technique as most guys placing personal ads either get no or one or two responses per week. Over the course of my getting 700 dates in a year I averaged over 50 responses a week with my newspaper techniques. But that is too long a story for this column. I suggest you get a copy of the book if you want to learn how to get that kind of volume of dates.

Mr. L. Rx

Posted in Flirt With Women, Newspaper Column.

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By admin – December 5, 2012

Serial Dating To Meet Women

DATING TO RELATING FOR MEN – WEEKLY COLUMN– 3/23/09

Dating To Relating For Men- Advice By Mr. L. Rx

Released by AssociatedNews.US

Mr. L. Rx is the author of the popular DatingToRelating.com website and the author of the popular book “Dating To Relating – From A To Z”. Have a question? Send it to Column@DatingToRelating.com and it may be selected for answer in this column. (Sorry all questions cannot be answered.)

Question: Mr. L. Rx, I hear you are a believer in “serial dating”. Why is that?

Answer: When I wrote the eReport “How I Got 700 Dates in One Year” it caused a little controversy — usually amongst women.

Many women think that multiple or serial dating is a no-no, something that only dysfunctional people do. Well I got news for you. Everything is situational. Anyone that has followed my writings would know that that is my theme.

First of all, I am very big on monogamy and have never cheated on a wife or girlfriend, but when I am between relationships I am equally big on multiple or serial dating.

Now I would be the first one to agree that a person who “multiple” or “serial” dates with no intention of ever doing anything else would have at least some major “relating” issues.

But, serial dating applied in the right context is not only not dysfunctional, but it is quite the opposite. Serial dating done to get a better understanding of the opposite sex, so you can figure out who you like, and what you like, and what kinds of people like you, is about the most mentally healthy thing you can do.

What do you think most parents tell their teenage sons and daughters?

They tell them: “Don’t get serious with one person, you need to date and meet a lot of girls/guys.”

Now believe it or not, this teenage advice can also be very good advice for adults.

First of all, most adults never followed their parents’ advice and dated lots of people. Most people seem to have a pattern of hooking up with the first “acceptable” person who shows them some real interest.

Unfortunately, there is a big difference between “acceptable” and “ideal” and also unfortunately most people usually continue this pattern of hooking up with the first “acceptable” person who comes along well into adulthood.

We call this “compromising” or “settling” and ultimately it leads to unhappiness in relationships, and a failure to understand the opposite sex.

You see there are many different types of people in the world and, believe it or not, there is someone for everyone. But the problem is you may have to meet a hell of a lot of people to find that one someone.

Another problem is that many people are so confused about life and relationships and people, they don’t really have any idea of what kind of personality is a good match for them. They base their ideals off of the Hollywood imagery of what they think they want.

The cure is simple. When you date and meet lots of people, sooner or later, you figure it out for yourself. It’s a natural process. You get comfortable with people, you realize that everyone is different, and that different types of people like different types of people. Eventually you figure out what kind of person you are and what kind of people you get along with best.

Mom and Dad’s teenage words of wisdom are good for everyone – or at least a lot of us. There are people who know what they want and don’t need to serial or multiple date to figure it out.

Mr. L. Rx

Posted in Meet Women, Newspaper Column.

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By admin – December 5, 2012

I Don’t Want To Be A PUA. I Just Want To Meet Women.

DATING TO RELATING FOR MEN – WEEKLY COLUMN– 3/16/09

Dating To Relating For Men- Advice By Mr. L. Rx

Released by AssociatedNews.US

Mr. L. Rx is the author of the popular DatingToRelating.com website and the author of the popular book “Dating To Relating – From A To Z”. Have a question? Send it to Column@DatingToRelating.com and it may be selected for answer in this column. (Sorry all questions cannot be answered.)

Question: I don’t want to be a pick up artist or a player. I just want to be able to go to bars or places, make friends and hang out with a group and they want to hang out with me and date a few girls until I find the girl for me. I want to be included and not be an outsider looking in. How can I do this?

Answer: Well, sounds like you are uncomfortable with women and perhaps people in general. And when you find yourself in such a condition, you have to start out with some basics and learn to get comfortable.

Learning is best done in gradients. If you try to do too high of a gradient too soon, you will fail.

So the first step in getting comfortable with people is to go somewhere where people interact and just observe. Observe them interacting and observe what seems to lead to successful interacting and what seems to lead to unsuccessful interacting. Yes, you will be an outsider looking in, but if you learn from your observations you won’t be an outsider forever.

When I got divorced from my wife who was also my first girlfriend and lover, I was very uncomfortable meeting women. But I forced myself to go out to crowded clubs every night for months. I would go there, stand at the bar, not talk to anyone (unless they talked to me) and just observe people all night.

Little by little I observed and learned what guys did and said that was successful and what they did and said that was not. I also learned what women seemed to like and not like.

It actually took me two months before I felt comfortable enough to talk to a woman and apply some of the things I had observed. But when I did, it worked. Then I started talking more and more and finally in another month I had my first successful sexual encounter with a woman I met in a bar.

Within another month, I totally mastered meeting women at bars and clubs.

I guess the moral of this story is don’t be afraid of experiencing uncomfortable situations. And don’t be afraid of failure. I have met many guys who are too uncomfortable to go stand at a bar for months being the “outsider looking in” so they stay at home and become the “outsider looking in” for the rest of their lives.

As long as you learn from “discomfort” and “failure”, discomfort and failure can be two of the best teachers you will ever have. Putting yourself in uncomfortable and failing situations with no intention to observe and learn from them is of course pointless. But putting yourself in the same situations with the intention to learn can lead to the fastest gains possible.

Of course it is also possible to avoid some of the uncomfortableness and failure by learning from people who have already done it and can pass on their observations and wisdom. Hence, there are people like me.

Mr. L. Rx

Posted in Meet Women, Newspaper Column.

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By admin – December 5, 2012

10 Second Personality Test When Approaching Women

DATING TO RELATING FOR MEN – WEEKLY COLUMN– 3/9/09

Dating To Relating For Men- Advice By Mr. L. Rx

Released by AssociatedNews.US

Mr. L. Rx is the author of the popular DatingToRelating.com website and the author of the popular book “Dating To Relating – From A To Z”. Have a question? Send it to Column@DatingToRelating.com and it may be selected for answer in this column. (Sorry all questions cannot be answered.)

Question: How do I learn about her fast (just by approaching her) before I talk to her?

Answer: Well I have a whole chapter devoted to this in my book “Dating To Relating – From A To Z” and an article on my website called “Feet, Personality Theory and Dating and Relationships” you might want to check them out, but here is a quick summary.

The fastest and quickest way you can assess personality is by what I call observing “feet angles” and best of all you can see it from across the room or down the hall when approaching her.

What are “feet angles”? Well this is a term I coined to refer to the angle between a person’s two feet.

Let us use the face of a clock for an example. Look at the big hand and the little hand. They both start at the same point in the center of the dial, but the tips of the big hand and little hand point to different places. The two lines formed by the big hand and the little hand create an angle. The angle between them is measured geometrically in degrees.

A circle has 360 degrees. So in the clock example every minute would be a change of 6 degrees. So if we use 12 noon or 12 o’clock. The two hands are parallel and there is no angle, or 0 degrees.

When it is 12:05 pm the hands create what is called a 30 degree angle. When it is 12:10 the two hands create a 60 degree angle. At 12:15 the two hands create a 90 degree angle and at 12:20 the two hands create a 120 degree angle.

Now the angles between human feet don’t get much wider than that, so for our purposes let’s stop the geometry lesson here.

Now here is the thing, “feet angles” correlate with personality at about an 80% to 90% consistency. That’s a high enough correlation to make some quick predictions when meeting people.

So first of all, observe and know your own “feet angle”.

For example, if you have straight feet (parallel with no angle) you definitely don’t want to get involved with anyone with a wide angel. Find someone with as straight feet as possible.

In general, know your own feet angles and find someone who is the same or only a few degrees different. Here is the Maxim you can apply:

MAXIM:1 – You should not get into a relationship with anyone who is more than 2-3 minutes on a clock face or 12- 24 degrees (geometrically) different than your own “angle between the feet”. People who are more than 2-3 minutes, or 12-24 degrees different from you are going to have personality types that are too different from you and more or less incompatible.

“Feet Angle” personality typing isn’t perfect. It will only be right 8 or 9 times out of 10. But that is pretty good for a quick, easy-to-apply rule.

Mr. L. Rx

Posted in Approach Women, Newspaper Column.

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By admin – December 5, 2012

THREE WAYS TO TELL IF HE IS CHEATING

HUMAN INTEREST / DATING & RELATIONSHIPS

THREE WAYS TO TELL IF HE IS CHEATING

AssociatedNews.US

By Durk Dugan

 

Is He Cheating?
Is He Cheating?

 

(AN) What would you think if you found out your boyfriend or husband has had sex with hundreds of other women without your ever knowing?

Well according to one reformed player that is exactly what he has done, except multiply the above figure by ten and he claims to have played and cheated on thousands of women without getting caught.

His cover name is Mr. P. L. Ayer and the good news is he is reformed and now writing for the DatingToRelating.com web site to help women who are being played and cheated on.

What brought about his “change of heart”? Well, he is now the proud father of two girls and he doesn’t want men doing to his girls what he had done to thousands of women.

In his soon to be released book “BUSTED: How To Spot a Player and Cheater” he goes into detail on over thirty some odd ways for women to spot and catch a cheater in the act.

Here are three clues to tell if your boyfriend or husband may be a player or cheater:

Dropped out time – Lying will get you caught. And players and cheaters like anyone else know that. So one of their favorite cover ups is to tell you something true while omitting other events. That way they don’t have to remember lies. So a man who is an hour and a half late getting home, might tell you he was caught up in traffic – true – but he doesn’t tell you he stopped off at the massage parlor to get a quickie for 30 minutes.

Be smart. Make sure the time-lines always add up. You will catch him at this sooner or later.

Quick Showers – Players often are having sex with two or three women in a day. They will often try to cover their tracks by saying they need to take a quick shower when coming to visit you. Inexperienced players will do it occasionally when they need to get the scent of another women off of them. Experienced players will establish this technique right away as a cover whether they need to or not.

If you find your boyfriend or husband doing this, be on the alert.

Early to bed – another favorite ploy of “boyfriend” players and cheaters is the early to bed routine. This one is simple. They call you at 9 pm or so, yawn while chatting to you on the phone, then say they are tired and are going to bed. This gives them the rest of the night off to see another girl.

This one is easy, call him a little later, go over for a late night surprise and see if he is there.

For more information visit www.DatingToRelating.com.

Posted in Dating/Relating For Women, Newspaper Column, Pick Up Women.

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By admin – December 5, 2012

Why Do Bad Boys Attract Women?

DATING TO RELATING FOR MEN – WEEKLY COLUMN– 3/2/09

Dating To Relating For Men- Advice By Mr. L. Rx

Released by AssociatedNews.US

Mr. L. Rx is the author of the popular DatingToRelating.com website and the author of the popular book “Dating To Relating – From A To Z”. Have a question? Send it to Column@DatingToRelating.com and it may be selected for answer in this column. (Sorry all questions cannot be answered.)

Question: Why is it the “nice guys” lose out and the “bad boys” attract women?

 

Answer: Well, we have all heard that myth, but I don’t think it is necessarily true. At least I don’t think it has anything to do with being a bad boy versus a nice guy.

 

I think there are other personality vectors involved that perhaps bad boys and nice guys have that are the defining qualities of attraction.

 

Bad boys tend to be less shy, but at the same time more confident in general than nice guys. I think that it would be these qualities that are attracting a woman not the fact that he is bad.

 

I personally have never used the “bad boy” approach, I am most always a perfect gentleman. However, I am not an easy catch and women can tell that immediately when talking to me. I am a little aloof, I don’t compliment women when I first meet them or tell them how beautiful they are, and most women don’t have a clue as to whether I am interested in them or just being nice.

 

That is what sets me apart from a “nice guy”. Women see me as a perfect gentleman but haven’t a clue if I like them or not. Women –especially very attractive women – like that. They are sick and tired of meeting men who fawn all over them.

 

Girls like guys who are interesting and unique. Attractive girls don’t find guys who tell them how beautiful they are to be unique. But a guy who has a pleasant conversation with them without mentioning a word about their beauty verbally or non-verbally – now that is both interesting and unique to a beautiful girl.

 

Also keep in mind that women have different personalities. And what is interesting and unique changes from personality to personality. A not-so-good-looking woman may find it totally interesting and unique to be told how pretty she is by a man. A woman who grows up in a society of perfect gentlemen, might very well find a guy who talks a little nasty and naughty to be interesting and unique. A woman who knows nothing but crude and ignorant men, would find a gentlemen to be a rare interesting and unique find.

 

You see no matter what you are like there is someone for you. But you have to define who that someone would be and then try to maximize how you would meet people like that. So no matter if you are a bad boy or a nice guy, put yourself in a position where you are interesting and unique to the women you meet and you will be successful.

Mr. L. Rx

Posted in Newspaper Column, Understanding Women.

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By admin – December 5, 2012

What To Say When You First Meet A Woman

DATING TO RELATING FOR MEN – WEEKLY COLUMN– 2/23/09

Dating To Relating For Men- Advice By Mr. L. Rx

Released by AssociatedNews.US

Mr. L. Rx is the author of the popular DatingToRelating.com website and the author of the popular book “Dating To Relating – From A To Z”. Have a question? Send it to Column@DatingToRelating.com and it may be selected for answer in this column. (Sorry all questions cannot be answered.)

Question: What should a person say when they first meet? “Are you seeing someone?” I mean not everyone’s single. You may have a great conversion just to find out they’re seeing someone.

Answer: Personally, I never ask a woman about her relationship state. It shows a lack of confidence to do so. However, I read signals and flirt a little to see how they respond. Also just because someone is “seeing” someone doesn’t mean they are in a committed relationship and aren’t interested in meeting you.

Watch the signals that a women gives you in a conversation. Is she just being polite talking to you or is she really interested? If she is in a relationship she will probably talk to you but won’t attempt to create any future with you (see you again). She might be a little standoffish and get even more so when you attempt to flirt.

If a woman is really interested in you she will flirt back and give you little clues that she wants to see you again. She will suggest doing something or meeting or talking or getting together. She will make a point of how she really enjoyed talking to you, at which point, you could suggest that you talk again or some more and ask for her phone number.

If you are observant you can figure out very quickly if a woman is flirting with you or if she is just being polite. Now if she is interested in you, and you show confidence enough to not ask if she is seeing someone, you will usually score a few points with her.

Question: How do you get and keep a girl interested in you when you think you are boring?

Answer: One of the hardest things to learn in life is that no matter what you are like there is always someone who is perfectly compatible with you. Even if you are boring there are women who are perfectly compatible with that. Not every one wants to meet and hook up with the life of the party.

The problem is people who don’t accept themselves for who they are, try to act differently and they are not being real, so they don’t attract anyone. Now if you just accept yourself for who you are and act the way you really are, you will find that there are people who will accept you for who you are. So don’t worry about whether you are boring or not, just be yourself. Sooner or later you will find a girl who will accept you for who you are.

Mr. L. Rx

Posted in Flirt With Women, Newspaper Column.

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By admin – December 5, 2012

How To Start A Conversation With A Girl

DATING TO RELATING FOR MEN – WEEKLY COLUMN– 2/9/09

Dating To Relating For Men- Advice By Mr. L. Rx

Released by AssociatedNews.US

Mr. L. Rx is the author of the popular DatingToRelating.com website and the author of the popular book “Dating To Relating – From A To Z”. Have a question? Send it to Column@DatingToRelating.com and it may be selected for answer in this column. (Sorry all questions cannot be answered.)

Question: What do you talk about when there is nothing to talk about. How do you spark conversation with ANY girl.

Answer: Good question. The best way to spark a conversation is to ask questions.

What do you ask questions about?

Well, I always just ask questions about anything I want to know. It varies from person to person. But typically if I am meeting someone new I might ask questions like “Do you have brothers and sisters?” “Do you get along with your parents?” “Do you have a lot of friends?”

Usually a person talks for a while when answering and that gives you more data to ask more questions about. Sometimes I will make a comment if it is appropriate or if they ask me a question in response to my question I just answer their question then ask them another one of my questions.

The hard times are when people just give you “yes” and “no” type answers. That doesn’t leave much to work off of.

When I feel the situation is awkward or the person isn’t talking much (like the above “yes” and “no” answers, then I talk about how awkward the situation is. Say something like “This is embarrassing. I feel so awkward. I don’t know what to say. Do you feel awkward too?”

Usually you can get a little conversation going on that topic and relieve a lot of tension just by admitting that you feel awkward and don’t know what to say. Then move into a question like “Ok, let’s see what we can talk about. What are your interests? Do you have any hobbies?”

Another questioning technique is to pay attention to what a person puts their attention on and talk about or ask questions about that. So, for example, if you are in a restaurant and the person you are dating isn’t talking much, just reading the menu, you might say “Kind of an interesting menu. What looks good to you?” That might spark a conversation about food or restaurants and menus, etc.

This technique is also good for meeting strangers. If you are in a grocery store next to some one attractive who is looking at “lamb chops” you might say: “I see you are interested in the lamb chops. Do you know a good way to cook them, I’ve always wanted to try them, but really don’t know how to cook them.”

Remember also that you are not necessarily going to get along with everyone you meet. So if you try, try, and try to get a decent conversation going and it doesn’t happen then this is probably not the best person for you.

 

Mr. L. Rx

Posted in Approach Women, Newspaper Column.

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By admin – December 5, 2012

Why Do Girls Flirt?

DATING TO RELATING FOR MEN – WEEKLY COLUMN– 2/2/09

Dating To Relating For Men- Advice By Mr. L. Rx

Released by AssociatedNews.US

Mr. L. Rx is the author of the popular DatingToRelating.com website and the author of the popular book “Dating To Relating – From A To Z”. Have a question? Send it to Column@DatingToRelating.com and it may be selected for answer in this column. (Sorry all questions cannot be answered.)

Question: Why do girls flirt with you and when you flirt back they push it away. It’s so confusing!!!

Answer: First of all, women have different personalities. What you are describing is a type of personality not all women in general. The personality type that usually does this kind of behavior is a little insecure. They are testing the water, but they don’t really want to jump in.

 

The best way to handle this personality type when you see it is not to react, not to take the bait so to speak. Let the girl flirt all she wants, let her take the lead. Let her control how the relationship goes. If you don’t react, she will get comfortable with you and steepen the gradient over time. If you react (flirt back) she will usually run away.

 

Problem is, however, people with similar or compatible personalities tend to hang out together. So sometimes you can get the impression that the whole world is one way, when in fact it may be only a certain percentage of people who are like that. So if you tend to think ALL women are one way. Change your environment, go somewhere different. Meet different people in different situations and perhaps you will discover different personality types and perhaps one that is more compatible with you.

 

Now having said that, let’s look at it from a different angle. Women in general like flirting for flirting’s sake more than men do. Men will flirt because they are interested in a woman. Women will flirt to see if they get a reaction, to see if they are looking good and are desirable, even when they are not interested in a man. They will flirt with a guy they are only interested in being friends with.

 

One way to get better control of these situations is to look at all the communication channels that a woman is using to communicate – Like verbal, emotional, physical, mental, and sexual communications.

 

When a women likes you she is likely to communicate that she likes you across all of the communications channels. When she is just playing around she will give you conflicting communications. So when you see a woman flirting with you, but she does not back up the flirting by showing you she likes you across ALL the communication channels – don’t take the flirtation seriously.

Mr. L. Rx

Posted in Date Women, Newspaper Column.

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By admin – December 5, 2012

Six Mistakes Guys Make On A First Date

DATING TO RELATING FOR MEN – WEEKLY COLUMN– 1/26/09

Dating To Relating For Men- Advice By Mr. L. Rx

Released by AssociatedNews.US

Mr. L. Rx is the author of the popular DatingToRelating.com website and the author of the popular book “Dating To Relating – From A To Z”. Have a question? Send it to Column@DatingToRelating.com and it may be selected for answer in this column. (Sorry all questions cannot be answered.)

Question: “What is the biggest mistake guys make on the first date that prevents ever having a second date or developing a sexual relationship (rather than a friendship)?”

 

Answer: Well, there are several mistakes a guy can make. Let me summarize the most common ones here. The biggest mistakes guys make on first dates are:

 

1) Talking about themselves too much. Trying to be interesting instead of interested.

2) Not asking questions and not listening enough.

3) Focusing too much on sex– either overtly or by innuendo.

4) Not using subtleties enough (What a woman understands)

5) Not developing sexual flow or interest.

6) Not creating future. (A relationship is all about future.)

 

The first mistake that most guys make is that they go on the first date and talk all about themselves, sort of strut around telling the girl that he’s got this car, and he’s got this job and he talks and talks and talks bragging about this and that trying to impress the girl that he is a good catch.

 

What a girl sees is a self-centered ego maniac that isn’t going to be able to take care of her at all, because he is not interested in her and doesn’t listen to what she has to say. Not a good relationship prospect.

 

Another way of saying it is that guys try to be interesting. They figure they have to be interesting for a girl to be interested in them. Sorry guys, but it doesn’t work that way. You have to be interested in the girl, not interesting to get her attention. Did you ever see two interesting people on a date. It is hilarious! They are both so busy trying to be interesting to the other that neither has time to be interested in the other.

 

If you don’t know what I am talking about, think what makes you feel better. A girl who is interested in you? Or a girl who is telling you how cool she is, how hot she is, etc. and all kinds of other interesting things.

 

Interesting leads to a lot of rejection and “platonic” friendships by the way. Girls will be friends with a guy who is really interesting. Why? Girls like to be amused and entertained. Interesting men are sort of like children to them. A source of non-sexual amusement and pleasure.

That is all we have room to talk about here, but you can get more data on the other five mistakes at:http://datingtorelating.com/products.

Mr. L. Rx

Posted in Date Women, Newspaper Column.

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By admin – December 4, 2012